New insights for a new year
This story hits hard.
Twin boys were raised by an alcoholic father, and one of the boys grew up to be an alcoholic. When asked what happened, he said, “I watched my father.”
The other boy grew up and never touched a drink. When asked what happened, he replied, “I watched my father.”
Two boys. Same dad. Two different perspectives.
One brother’s a victim.
The other has taken ownership of his life.
That got me thinking: Which brother am I?
Am I living as a victim?
Or am I living victoriously?
We don’t see things as they are. We see things as WE are.
In other words, do I see ...
•Obstacles ... or growth challenges.
•“Knucklehead” kids ... or a chance to influence a misguided youth.
•That “mean” barista at the coffee shop ... or someone who is struggling with some deep personal issues.
•The dude who just took “my” parking space ... or the 27-year employee who was laid off an hour earlier.
•Basketball players who “just don’t get it” ... or maybe a needed change to my coaching methods.
•The “difficult” client who asks dozens of questions … or a chance to display patience and wisdom.
•The elderly woman in the grocery line who ALWAYS writes a check and ALWAYS needs customer assistance ... or the devoted wife of 52 years who just lost her husband.
Problems.
Or opportunities.
Victim.
Or victorious.
What we see really does determine the direction of our lives.
And I see I’ve still got plenty of room to grow.
Hold the crown six inches above their head and allow them to grow into it.
Go ahead and read that again. Slowly this time.
It’s so, so good.
THAT’S the kind of parent I want to be. THAT’S the kind of coach I want to be. THAT’S the kind of environment I want to create. THAT’S the kind of standard that inspires me to be a better man.
Maybe it will do the same for you.
True confession: I hate rules. I hate to be told what to do. I hate to be threatened with punishment. I hate to be called out.
But I love to be challenged. I love to be called UP. I love to learn and grow. I love to share what I learn.
And I’d love to do that right now.
As you read this sentence, 2020 is nearly a memory. Some might call it a nightmare. And in many ways, it was. Yet I am truly grateful for the “reset” on my priorities and my perspective.
So as the ball drops and we ring in a new year, I’ve got nothing for you in the way of resolutions or strategies. I’m so done with all of that. But I will share something I learned just the other day. And this insight couldn’t have come at a better time.
You are the physical manifestation of your standards.
Go ahead and read that again. Slowly this time.
It’s just one simple line. But its depth is breath-taking.
A week ago, many of us celebrated Christmas, the day when the Word of God, the person of God, and the attributes of God became flesh and entered our world to live among us.
In essence, the baby Jesus became a physical manifestation of heavenly standards. If you want to know what God’s like, look at Jesus.
So if I am a physical manifestation of MY standards, what should I look like? Maybe an even better question would be: Do I even HAVE standards?
In the past, I’ve been much more comfortable setting goals at this time of year. Not any more. This year will be different. This year will be much simpler.
This year I won’t be a prisoner to numbers like weight or age or salary or page views or shares.
Instead, I will fix my gaze on two things that cannot change — even if 2021 turns out to be like the last 12 months.
1) I’ll remember my identity — I’m an adopted child of God, uniquely prepared for good works, empowered with the boldness and courage of a lion and the meekness and humility of a lamb.
2) I’ll remember I won’t always live up to my identity — But I know there’s Someone who can live it out through me. With that truth in my heart, I am free to pursue just one human standard in 2021, and it’s a remix of John 3:30. You can read that verse yourself to know exactly what I’m talking about, but here’s a paraphrase:
Just stay out of his way.
That’s it. Just stay out of his way.
So, what should your standard be in the new year? Only you can answer that — it will be YOUR standard, after all. But here’s the formula I used to come up with mine:
If I want my faith to ________________
Then I need to ____________________
Substitute whatever you like for yours.
If I want my body to ______________
Then I need to __________________
If I want my career to ______________
Then I need to __________________
Simple, yes.
Easy. Not at all.
Worth it? You tell me next December.
So time to buckle up, everyone. It could be another wild ride in 2021. But I’m moving forward with great confidence because:
I know who I am.
I know what my standard is.
I know there’s a crown that rests just a few inches above my head.
Yet with a new perspective, it no longer matters that I can’t reach it on my own.
I know Someone who already has.
He got it for me.
(Tim Kolodziej is the creator of EnspireU.com and author of this piece. If you would like to receive encouraging/inspiring messages, videos, and motivational stories each morning, text him at (412) 226-4977.)