Two depressing, and beautiful, words to live by
“Now what?”
Two words. Two short, simple words.
Yet they’re often two of the most depressing words we’ll ever utter.
Here’s an example …
After nearly two decades of marriage, a husband is growing tired of his wife. Meanwhile, his company has hired a gorgeous new marking director and he’s been assigned to mentor her on the firm’s processes and culture.
She smells great. She laughs at his jokes. She delivers undivided attention when he speaks. SHE is the one he’s been dreaming of the past few years as his marriage has soured.
After dinner and a few drinks together, they act on their impulses.
The next morning, they both sober up and realize what’s happened. They realize their relationship has changed. They realize EVERYTHING has changed.
Then he heads home and he realizes NOTHING has changed.
“Now what?”
He’s still married.
He still has three kids.
He still works with the same company.
He’s still 46, but suddenly unfaithful to his wife. He’s wondering if this is all a bad dream.
“Now what?”
Did anyone see us out together last night?
How should I act at work?
How can I keep my wife from finding out?
Should I tell my boss?
“Now what?”
Two words. Two short, simple words.
Yet they’re often two of the most depressing words we’ll ever utter.
A couple more examples …
A new coaching position — You’re offered a job at a high school that used to win big but has fallen on hard times in recent years. Not much talent on the varsity. Not a lot coming up in the feeder system. But your ego says you’re the woman who can turn it all around. You sign the contract.
Now what? — Are you REALLY prepared to be in the gym for countless hours to help turn bad players into average? Are you ready for the seniors who will inevitably battle the new coach? Can you deal with school board members who want to win NOW? Can you reason with the parents who want their child to play quality minutes, even though she never attended a summer workout?
“Now what?”
A new car — You entered the dealership looking for a modest, mid-sized sedan. The salesperson persuaded you to “level up” and get the high-end, luxury model because you’ve admired others in your office driving one.
Now what? — You love grabbing that drive-through coffee on the way to work but saving that amount each week will go a long way toward making your car payment. Can you do it? Your church has launched a new building project and your pastor wants to meet for lunch to discuss it. What will you say if you’re asked to make a contribution? Then you learn your son needs braces, your furnace is broken and your dog is scheduled for surgery.
“Now what?”
Getting away — You’ve been dreaming of this for years, and now it’s time. You decide to retire early and open up a surf shop at the beach.
Now what? — A month in, you realize it’s actually work and you’re NOT on vacation. You realize when everyone else is enjoying the ocean and fun in the sun, you’re inside hustling to pay the rent, hiring employees who show up on time, and keeping the insects at bay. After another month in, you realize it’s not going to change.
“Now what?”
Two words. Two short, simple words.
Yet they’re often two of the most depressing words we’ll ever utter.
But here’s the twist. They’re only depressing if timed improperly.
If we say them BEFORE we make major decisions, they can become two of the most beautiful words in the English language. Especially if we follow through all the way to a logical conclusion.
NOW ––––––> Always decide before you are invested too deeply to turn back.
WHAT –––––> What do you REALLY want by making this decision?
Not sure?
Then here’s one more word for you:
“No.”
Just learn how to say it. Then repeat it often.
Trust me. It’s prevented “now what” more than you can imagine.
And it’s led countless people to say “thank you” even more.
You’re welcome.
I hope.
(Tim Kolodziej is the author of this piece and founder of EnspireU.com. When he’s not behind a laptop, he can be found inside a gym helping young athletes create their own unique future — one rep at a time. Click here to connect with him by email.)